9.26.2006

119 - News Flash!

Tues, West St.Paul, MN.

Resident Carolyn Swiszcz was nearly crushed by a CROCANTHOSAURUS, or High-Spined Lizard, today in a park by her home. Scientists believe that this herd of 10-14 ,thought to be extinct, dinosaurs were simply hibernating all these years inside the St.Paul bluffs.

Most are fierce predators that are roughly 30-40 feet (9-12 m) long and weigh about 5,000 pounds (2300 kg). They have a big heads, with a 4.5 foot (1.4 m) long skull and 68 thin, sharp, frightening, serrated teeth, and 17-inch (43 cm) spikes extending from their vertebrae, along the neck and tail, that have formed a thick, yucky, fleshy sail on its back. They have powerful arms, and each hand has three tiny fingers, equipped with long, 12 foot long sickle-like claws that like to scratch and poke.

Experts agree that had this one beast, which was present in the above photo. had extended its foot further in the direction of Mrs.Swiszcz's person she would certainly not be alive right now but would instead be the size and shape of a rather thin manhole cover.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Haha. That pic is awesome